We are SURVIVORS!

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Get ready because I am about to throw some 90’s music at you!

Today, as I was driving- well let me back up.  This last month has been HARD.

Starting my own business has stretched me (at times) more than I would like to feel.

And last night, I hit a breaking point.  The thought came into my mind:  “Maybe I should just give up.  This is too fucking hard.” 

And then I got pissed.  I don’t get mad a lot, but last night I got mad.

Why the hell aren’t things going the way I want them to?

How come I feel like my wheels are spinning?

How come everyone else is making money and getting clients, and I’m not!?

How am I going to be able to afford my new house?

HELPPPPPPP!

At this point, it was past 10:00pm and my bedtime and I was tired. 

I went to bed.

This morning before I meditated, I set the intention to receive guidance from the Universe.

It went like this: 

Me:  How in the world do I reach my money and business goals, this month?  I feel so lost and confused.

Universe/Inner Wisdom: How would you feel if someone gave you $1,000 – $5,000 dollars?

Me:  I would feel relaxed and calm.  I wouldn’t worry so much and I imagine life would feel easier and happier.

Universe/Inner Wisdom:  Live like that NOW!  Begin to feel CALM and RELAXED, RIGHT now, not when you reach your money or your business goals, but NOW. 
The whole point in life is to feel good.  Start by FEELING what you want to FEEL, right now, and see what happens.

At this point, I was SO exhausted, mentally and emotionally, that I accepted this advice and began to introduce feelings of relaxation and calmness into my body.  

I finished my meditation, and realized that it was 9:45am.  

“SHIT.”  I thought to myself,  “I had to be at the bank (for my Dad), at9:00am.”

I quickly gave thanks to the Universe, and headed out the door.

I got in my car, started backing up, became distracted by my phone (UGH), and all of a sudden I was in the DITCH, in my own driveway.

(For REALS. right now!?)

Side note:  I live in Montana, in the country, and there is A LOT of snow.

So there I was, stuck in the ditch (of my own driveway), and wondering what the hell had just happened.

I left my car (it was not budging), got into my Mom’s car, and was on my way.

As I was driving, I changed the radio station, and I heard:

I’m a survivor 
I’m not gon give up 
I’m not gon stop
I’m gon work harder
I’m a survivor 
I’m gonna make it 
I will survive
Keep on survivin’

I’m a survivor 
I’m not gon give up 
I’m not gon stop
I’m gon work harder
I’m a survivor
I’m gonna make it
I will survive
Keep on survivin’
 

THANK GOD.  

This was exactly what I needed to hear.  

THANK YOU, UNIVERSE! 

As I listened and sang my heart out to the song, I imagined that I was singing to the fear; the voice inside my head who beats me up and reminds me of how I won’t make it and WHY.

(Listen to the song here, and see what I mean!)

Throughout the rest of the day, I began treating those voices in my head, like little children in a classroom.  

Like this:

Voice in my head (inner mean girl):  How are you going to make it happen? You NEED to know NOW!

Me: Is that helpful?

Voice in my head (inner mean girl): No

Me: Then please keep your mouth shut unless you have something nice to say.  And while you’re at it, go sit at the back of the room, and don’t come back up to the front until you’re behaving better.

I have been doing this all day!  And guess what?  IT WORKS!

WE ARE SURVIVORS, and we are NOT meant to give up.  WE are going to keep trying and will never STOP.

Do not let that voice take over the teacher’s roll, THAT IS YOUR ROLL.  You are the teacher, and your inner mean girl is the student.  Start treating your inner mean girl like the child who isn’t behaving.  

Think about it:  If a child acts out: makes fun of others, throws pencils and markers, and/or hurts peoples feelings, YOU as the TEACHER, would well him or her NO, and make him/her act accordingly.

That is exactly how you treat the voice in your head.  Until he/she can behave nicely and give you positive and encouraging advice, he/she is not allowed to be listened to.  EVER.

Be strong.

I believe in you.

YOU ARE A:

survivor