This quote caught my attention the first time I saw it. The original quote was by Abraham Lincoln. He quoted, “I do not like that man, I must get to know him better.” I wanted to change it and gear it towards woman, only because I feel like females tend to be more critical of one another.

I can remember being in the fifth grade and innocently watching myself and others bully and be bullied. The cruel behavior that young girls are capable of still boggles my mind. And although in the 5th grade, we were too young to comprehend the cliques and bullying, those memories are still with us today.

I have witnessed and experienced the ups and downs of many friendships. I have judged and been judged thousands and thousands of times. But in all honesty, judging another being does not change that person, it only reflects the person I am. All judgments stem from within; whatever we see as a threat or negative quality in another person, we first see in ourselves.

Take a look below to see what steps are needed to commit to living a more loving and non-judgment lifestyle.

Step 1:
Be Aware.
Listen to your thoughts when you judge another person. What do you feel? Acknowledging how you feel when placing judgements on another being is the first step towards recognizing where the judgement is stemming from.

Step 2:
Self-Love.
Treat yourself with more respect and love. The reason you are judging someone is because you are not fully comfortable or loved by yourself. Think nicely about yourself and try not to speak down about yourself. Remember: You are your own best friend.

Step 3:
Take Action.
Now that you are aware of when and why you are judging another person, it is time to slowly touch on the brakes. When you feel yourself judging another person try to replace the judgement with a nice thought. Sometimes I apologize to myself and to that person in my mind and then note to try better next time.

It is essential to have an open mind and heart.  Rather then pointing out only the negative qualities in a person, try seeing the other side, the positive attributes in a person.  This may seem hard at first, but once practiced, it soon will become a habit.  Focus on the good in yourself and in others and good will come to you.

If we can commit to seeing those whom we do not like through a more loving lens, we will then create more peace and love for ourselves and those around us.

Love yourself the way you would want someone else to love you. Then love others the way you love yourself.