If we judge others, we have no time to love them. – Mother Theresa
Why do we judge others?
Fears and insecurities formed by our egos.
What gives us the right to make judgments upon others?
We have no right.
What do we benefit by judging others?
A slight and momentarily feeling of satisfaction.
Judging others is something we all developed at a young age; over the course of our lives, this habit can improve, disappear, or worsen, depending on that individuals life’s experiences.
Judging others is something that I acquired at a very young age. As I matured into adolescence it grew worse. It only started to diminish, as I began accepting and loving myself for who I was.
Below are a few questions that pertain to judging others. I will answer each question based off of the lessons and life experiences that I have learned in my life:)
Why did I judge others?
To feel better about myself.
There was a time, when being critical of others, played a significant role in my life. I allowed my ego to take control of my mind. I believed that judging others boosted my self-esteem, when in reality, I was only fueling the fire for the ego, and providing it life.
Judgements do not come from the heart, they are created from the ego. This means when we judge others, we are living through our egos and not through our hearts.
Although I still slip up and place judgements upon others, I have come to a place in my life, where the need to judge others has been replaced by the new-found love that I have for myself. When you begin to love yourself, the insecurities start to die out, and rather than sizing people up in your own head, you come to accept them just the way they are.
What were the most recurring judgments I made about others?
This is where most of my judgements stemmed from.
I lacked self-confidence as a teenager. This lack of confidence continued on into my early twenties, which is why most of my judgements pertain to my own personal self-image.
During my teen years and early twenties, comparing myself to others became a daily habit. I would constantly look at different body images, either to make sure I looked better or often realizing I didn’t and then feeling bad about myself. My inner ego craved to be the skinniest and the prettiest, and judging others provided me with the reassurance I thought I needed.
How have I slowed my judgements?
Loving and accepting myself just the way I am.
When I feel a negative thought arising, I bring myself back to the present moment and stop my thinking process, to ensure that that thought will leave my mind.
When you focus on the present moment, your mind has nowhere to go but right where you are.
I also like to remind myself on a daily basis, that I love and accept my body just the way is it.
Do not allow your ego to make you believe false accusations about yourself or anyone else.
Stop looking at celebrity magazines or tv shows!!! It’s all bogus! 😉
And remember what we were taught as children:
Treat others the way you would like to be treated.
Although this seems like a simple concept, many of us forget to practice it in our daily lives.
This reminder can be used as a very useful tool when you feel the need to judge someone.
What if someone was judging you? Sizing you up in their minds, or thinking rude things about you! It is not something that any of us like to feel. So why make others feel that way? Especially when a great deal of the time, we don’t know any of the struggles and tribulations that person has gone through.
Until you can walk in that person’s shoes, see what they have seen and feel what they have felt, you have no right to make assumptions based on how they look, their intelligence level, lifestyle choices, income level, etc.
We must all accept and love one another in order to evolve into the humans we know we can be:)
Accept everyone, love everyone, and be happy.
Or as Mother Theresa quoted:
If we judge others, we have no time to love them.
Be good, be happy, be true, be you!